Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be ME? Well, it’s your lucky day! Come take a walk in my paws and I’ll show you what it’s like to be a Big Bad Pomeranian.
At the undogly hour of 556548413:00 AM. What? How many times have I told you, I’m a dog, I can’t tell time! Momma turns her alarm off and then she gives my paw a little squeeze (I make Momma hold my paw as we sleep) and gives me a kiss on the top of my head.
I take another 4 or 9 hours, or maybe like 5 minutes, to slowly get up and rub the sleepies from my eyes and start my day.
While Momma is in the bathroom doing Dog knows what, I do my first security walk of the day. We have dog doors, so I go outside, do my business, sniff a few things, and bark at Steve the Squirrel (he’s always there watching me!). Then I come in and take my security post, laying down right by the bathroom door. I’m super quiet, but Momma somehow knows that I’m outside, so she opens the door and I come in and protect her from inside the bathroom.
Momma is FINALLY done getting all pretty and we go back to the bedroom, but she picks me up as soon as we are near the bed and gives me about 14,445,654 kisses and hugs before she tells me to go cuddle up to Mille or Dad. Then she goes into the kitchen to finish getting ready.
Momma comes in to tell Dada “Bye and love you” and he grunts something. Then we do our morning ritual… Momma does this EVERY MORNING before she leaves. She gives me kisses and belly rubs and then we have this conversation:
Momma: “Peanut, I need to you be extremely cute and adorable, all day, until I get home.”
Me: “On it, Mom!”
Momma: “I also need you to protect this house and Dada like a Big Bad Pomeranian.”
Me: “Oh, I’m on it, that’s my jam!”
Gives me a ton more kisses. As she tells Alexa to turn off the bedroom, she gives me one last kiss. Sometimes when I’m super sleepy I grumble at her, and she tells me I’m being a grumble bear or grumble bug. Then I hear the door close and take my first naps of the day!
Between 8:00 AM – 9:00 AM
Dada works from home, so his wakeup time changes daily. I usually get my pants out of bed when I can smell NUMMIES. But they aren’t MY nummies they are Dada’s nummies. He has the nerve to make nummies and not share! Unlike Momma, she shares her nummies with us!
Our bowls are in different places because we like our own space. My bowl is in the room with the fire place on my favorite area rug. Mille has hers by the water dish and Linc has his in the family room.
Security walk. Bark at that darn Steve the Squirrel and shake my paw at him and tell him to “Get off my lawn.” Then bark Hi to the neighbor dogs who are also on their security walk.
Go find Dad to make sure he is working and either jump up on the chair or snuggle up in the blankets that are on the floor. I’m kind of his manager so I need to make sure he’s working while I nap.
Bark at a delivery truck that I can hear from 3 blocks away. I know it’s coming towards my house! And I must PROTECT the house at all costs. Seriously Me and Linc can hear these diesel trucks from blocks away and we are on high alert! Momma says its just the FedEx, UPS or Mail, I say it’s a threat and I need to bark accordingly!
Security check and then check on Dad to make he is safe from all dangers and working, then nap a little more.
I wake up from my 10,000th nap of the day and tell Dad “I miss Momma so much, and I bet she misses me even more so please take a pic of me and send her, her daily “Frankie Fix” What is a Frankie Fix you are asking? Well, Dad takes a pic of me at that very moment doing whatever i am doing, usually snuggling Bruno or mid bark. Its just a way to make Momma smile while she is at work! Works every time!!
Sometimes Momma is so stressed at work that she will text Dad and he takes a pic of me without me knowing and sometimes catches my pants!! But thats OK because I know my pants will make momma smile!
12:00 PM – 5:00 PM
I know Mom is coming home any minute, so I must bark at every noise I hear. And dawg do I mean EVERY noise, from our neighbor dog walking his human to Steve the Squirrel who is now in my front yard (I can see him because I’m up on the chair that looks out the front window), to a random bird or leaf that flew by too fast!
12:30 PM – 3:00 PM
I see this guy walking through my neighbors’ lawns so I bark and OMG Dada says “shut up Frankie.” I look at him and bark louder! I must protect the house from the guy that comes every day. So me and Linc get up from where we are and go run to the door and bark for a good 5 or 100 minutes. We scare him off every time!
Dad gives us our night time nummies, but I usually save a little room because I know Mom will be home and I’ll be having some of her nummies.
Hear a car and jump off the chair to go investigate. And Oh My Dog it’s finally MOMMA! She’s finally home. It’s been like 129,354 hours! Okay maybe just 11, but still, I miss her so much I need to let her know how much I missed her and how excited I am she’s home so when she walks in the house I bark my pants off until she picks me up! And once in Momma’s arms Im one happy little dude.
She puts me down so she can put her bags away and as we walk to the bedroom I bark and jump up and paw the back of her legs until we are in the bedroom and then I run up the stairs so I can get up on the bed and she gives me a kiss! Sometimes I need to show her how extremely cute I am and I will bounce like a bunny all over the bed.
Second night time nummies. Ok maybe it’s Momma’s dinner but I insist cause I need to test her food to make sure she is going to like it. When I’m done eating her nums I do a security walk to make sure Steve got the message.
I’m so tired from barking and protecting the house and napping. I’m ready for bed. If Momma is watching TV, I insist we go night night and once she gets up to get water or just gets up at all, I herd her to the bedroom. Most of the time she follows and we get ready for night night.
We watch a little TV. My favorite is when the show has a dog in it.
8:00 PM – 10:00 PM
We cuddle and when I’m a super sleepy puppy, I demand we go night night. I get up from wherever I am in the bed and come around to her side and stare at her and then she knows I mean business and it’s time for night night.
I cuddle up to momma and make her hold my paw and we go night night and get ready to do it all over again tomorrow.